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Saturday, 29 March 2014

Don't women need their space?

So for months, I have been looking at all the married woman around me and thinking do they have a life? Don’t mistake me for being rude. By asking do they have a life I mean after marriage, do they go out with their friends and do their thing? Do they get some time off their family or husband, well I know the husband gets a time off every now and then but does the lady get it? Do they go out and do their thing, wear the type clothes they want to wear and live their dream or follow their passion. I think 90% of the women would say no or they may say yes I do, so the society doesn’t think otherwise.

I wouldn’t blame men either; I think it is something to do with the way they are brought up. My dad who is apparently from a generation before mine, allows my mom to do everything she wants to do because my grandma does what she wants to do. In my family men and women are equal they never say women don’t do this or men are supposed to do that. So my dad lets my mom do anything she wants to do even if that means wasting money on something she wants to experiment he never questions. Sometimes she just informs and don’t even bother asking for permission like most of the women of her generation does. The choice of clothes she wears and how she wants to spend her time and with whom is purely her choice. This got passed over to me. I am a totally independent person free to make my own decisions about my life. So when I see the typical Indian parents or wife and husband I start thinking why do they not give women the space they should have or why are women behaving like their husband is their world? Isn’t it awful? This is like you go to school and college get big degrees to dedicate your degree, talent and life to a man. Well, I am not generalizing here but isn’t this the hard truth in many cases? It makes me very sad.

Today, I was watching my favourite movie sex and the city where Carrie Bradshaw says everybody needs some time off for them which is absolutely true. It is not necessary for a person to be around people all the time. She needs her personal space and she should live her life the way she wants to do and do things she likes to do. A marriage cannot take away her dreams or let her not pursue what she wants to. If that happens then there is something very wrong about that relationship. Many of you might say, it is not possible because this is how it’s been but then there is always a beginning. Women are not made to take care of others, cook for the family and slog in the kitchen and at home all day and night throughout her life. She had a life before marriage, she had dreams she might have wanted to pursue, she would have had a passion and she might have wanted to become something.

I think women get caught up so much in their marriage that they forget what they want because they stop thinking for themselves, it is very good to see them make their husband and family the center of their life but I strongly believe that should not be the case. A human being should live for a purpose and trust me family and husband is not a purpose. You are an individual and you need to stand up for your dreams and the things you want to be and achieve. You are a wife, a daughter, a mother, a caretaker, a homemaker but those are the roles you play in everybody else’s life but what are you and what defines you? You should really think. Maybe this satisfies you at this point of time but there might come a time where you might regret not doing something that you could have done or for not chasing your dreams. So get out and let yourself loose sometimes. Live for yourself too, live your dreams and set those wings free and see how far you can fly! 


  1. Me being a Woman never regret for neither for the role I played nor for not getting space for me. Why because I love my family. Love all Gayu...................

    1. Sadly, you didn't get what I am saying here. Loving your family is good but that doesn't mean you never had dreams? Was your dream only to love the family you made?

  2. Thoughts provoking indeed!!
    And yeah...there has to be a beginning....let me start from MY family :)

    1. That's awesome. I am happy to hear that! Thank you for the comment.


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