There was a very best friend of mine. Yes, he “was” and is not anymore. So I used to call him every single day to tell him what happened that day and he listens to everything I say very patiently. He was with me through my bad times watching me cry and giving me his shoulders while I wanted one. Years rolled off and the friendship grew. He had a job change where he got new friends. Slowly, Calls reduced, we stopped texting each other. Whenever I asked him he said he was busy and I understood that he’s got his own world and I cannot force him to stay with me anymore. But we humans tend to hold onto the one who wants to leave us don’t we? I did the same thing.
I would call him daily and my calls used to be unattended, he rarely responds my messages. I wouldn’t blame him at all because he had to work in grave shifts and getting accustomed to it is not a very easy thing! Finally, calls got limited to a week, bi-weekly, a month. There came a day when I told him, “Ish, I really miss you a lot. I guess we get our old times back and you spend as much time as you could with me.”
He immediately called me. That was our ritual if either one of us say “I miss you” the other calls. But to my surprise, we did not have much to talk! I had to hang up the call because we did not have anything to talk! This guy once spent hours together with me on phone! We had so many things to talk and now we were pondering over the topics to talk and that made me wonder, “What! I don’t have anything to talk to him?” and he was sensible enough and told me, “Hey Gayu, I think we have got our own world and the hard fact is they are two different worlds! And that should make us talk for a long time but on the other hand we have nothing to talk! Strange” my reply was, “oh Yea! I guess so!” And you know what I don’t talk to this friend at all and we have no issues about it these days!
Have there been times when you have wondered, “What happened to the relationship that was so strong?” The person who loved you for every silly thing you did, the person who stood by you through thick and thin, the person with whom you shared your secrets and the most silly thing you did for the day leaves you over time and you are able to realize that. the person is also letting you know that he/she wants to move and cannot spend time with you as they used to. This person could be your friend, your love, sometimes they can be a relative of yours whom you loved the most! What do you do during these times? You go behind them and make them understand that they mean a lot to you, they wouldn’t listen, You can cry to them, they wouldn’t heed, you try to explain them how much you miss them they don’t care. What else can you do? You have to understand that it’s just over! Time changes every human, sometimes it is cruel enough to take away the intimacy between the loved ones. And you wake up one day only to know that it’s all over and they are not going to come back and all you have that would remind you of them are those beautiful memories.
Sometimes we have to learn to let people go when they want to go away and understand the fact that the relationship, the love and the intimacy is still there but they have got their own world and they cannot spend as much time as they did! A rare hi to say that you are still there, a simple poke on FB would suffice. Never try to think why it got over, just accept it and move on! Afterall, not all questions in life are answered!
And that’s when I say,
“Do not cry coz it’s over, smile coz it happened.”